Red

It’s what I feel in my cheeks when they flush as he calls me cute or sweet. It’s what my blood looks like, especially when it quickens along its path when he pulls me in a little closer and a little tighter. It’s my lips on a Friday night out dancing, hoping that he’ll notice…

Restart

via Daily Prompt: Restart   There are things in my life that I miss so much. I think about the late 4 am nights where I ran through the local park with my friends, laughing until I couldn’t breathe anymore. I think about sitting in that same park, gazing at the stars with a man…

“Why didn’t they speak up sooner?”

So I’ve shared my Me Too story on here with you all. With the wake of the Larry Nassar case and the vast, vast amount of women he’s tormented over the last 30 years finally being able to speak out and be heard, I have to say that I am proud, but also frustrated and…

A night to remember

6 months ago I was sitting behind the lost colony theatre with a boy who’s hand was on my thigh while we stared up at the stars. The water gently lapping up on the rocks around us, a soothing sound, and everything was quiet. The stars were abundant, something I really really loved about the…

The Pain of Letting Go.

Picture this:   I’m 10 years old, and I’m still in the stage where I’m deeply afraid of storms. Picture me in the back seat of my mom and dad’s 1997 white Monte Carlo, where the first gigantic rain drop hits the car with a thud like a bullet. It resonates through my whole body,…

“The Road Not Taken”

Okay, so I know a lot of you have been wondering, what the hell is Tanya doing now? Where is she now?   It’s no secret that I’ve been constantly on the move the last several months. Graduating college, England, Scotland, back home, to the outer banks, back home, Ireland, and then Chicago TWICE. Finally…

Me Too.

TW: Rape/sexual assault.   I’ve debated long and hard with myself whether or not I was going to write and publish this, and as my fingers drift across the keyboard, I find myself still debating. I probably won’t share this on social media like I have other posts, but if you know me, and you…

The Day the Earth Stood Still

It comes and goes in waves, like the ones I used to get up at 5 am for to watch as the morning sun slowly and lovingly peeped over them, the realization that I have been completely single for 5 years now. The day the earth stood still, was when the last, and only, person…

Metanoia

(n.) the journey of changing one’s mind, heart, self, or way of life.   A Greek philosophy. Also seen as a great psychological breakdown, followed by healing, rebuilding, and growth. I’ve already been through a great breakdown, and I’m ready to heal. Ready to move, to live, to love, to enjoy. I always talk about…

Radiantly broken

Two days ago I finished the last leg of my 7 day All Ireland tour with an amazing guide and a fan-fecking-tastic group of people.   Everyone knows that about 2 months ago, I was devasted with the news that I would not be moving to england. Trying to pick up the pieces of my…